The Darker Side of War
by CrazyGirlMe
Summary: Scout is having troubles dealing with being in a war and seeks out someone to talk to aka Medic. Music Inspired. Pre-Respawn.


**As per normal, house rules apply thus not mine, don't sue ect ect.**

_**A little something I put together, inspired by the cover of 'I was only 19' by The Herd (Yeh I'm an Aussie hip-hop fan. The Herd does the song justice, one of my top three best covers ever). Might help to check out the song before you read. **_

_**I'm not good at serious stuff, I try but it doesn't come out like I intended it to be. My style is comedy.**_

_**R&R would be awesome, be gentle – serious aint my strong point to write/draw : )**_

**The Darker Side of War.**

**Re-posting a Beta version that GothicCheshire took it upon herself to do for me, I had no idea. So everyone would you kindly give her a big round of applause for her and her superhero abilities in doing battle with my spelling in her spare time : D**

"Yo Doc? You got a minute?" Scout asked, ducking his head into the med bay.

Medic looked up from the mountain of paperwork that overran the desk. "Herr Scout. What are you doing up so late? Of course I have a minute; in fact it looks like I've got most of the night"

It was way past midnight. The war had long since rid the days of the week from their minds, there was no such thing on the battlefield. The only thing that was of concern was survival. You either did or you didn't, it didn't matter if you were 'the battle hardened veteran' or 'the week old rookie', you slip and chances are that it was permanent.

Scout nervously walked to the chair across from the desk. Medic noted how dark bags made their homes under the young runner's eyes, and, although he couldn't be sure, the boy looked a little pale compared to last week, even skinnier. Medic leaned back in his chair and nodded to the boy to talk.

"...I...err. I just need so talk to someone, ya know. Kind of like a shrink..." Scout seemed a little reluctant to talk.

"I am, by a medical means, more a doctor then a 'shrink' however it was lightly covered. If it makes it easier, I can appeal to you as...a friend." Medic leaned his head to the side, reluctant to say the word. Becoming friends with teammates was something Medic was against; it only made it harder when the inevitable came to pass. Others, on the other hand, strongly disagreed with that theory, arguments, and debates on the topic were a regular thing in the base in what was poorly referred to as downtime.

"I can't sleep man. Haven't been able to sleep for the past week. Everything just keeps haunting me."

"We are at war. Day after day we go out there and put our lives on the line, protecting, serving, and fighting for a cause I have sadly long since forgotten. It is not for the weak of heart Herr Scout, it haunts us all. Some more than others. The reason I sleep soundly is because of my profession, I've seen far worse than the brutal mess out there." Medic locked eyes with Scout; he was only stating the facts. That was the reason why the study of the human mind got boring for the good Doctor when thoughts and emotions got involved.

Scout looked down at his legs, taking the words in. "I know, but is it normal to see the screaming mess of long lost teammates? I close my eyes and it's a different one each time. Like I tried to stop the bleeding, tried that CPR thing, every time but..."

"Not everyone can be saved. The human body can only take so much before it stops. You are taught to apply first aid till help arrives. You do what you can, we all trust you skills, don't doubt them. Try not to let it affect you; it only clouds your mind. I can prescribe you something to help you sleep." Medic pulled a tray of tablets out the top draw of the desk, handing a couple to the boy.

"Thanks Doc." Scout added with a forced smile.

"Is there something else?" the doctor added after Scout failed to move.

"I can hardly eat. I don't know why. I mean I love what I eat. I don't know though, recently I just can't eat."

Medic hummed this over, "It is a concerning matter Scout, you need to eat. You are already too thin. What we do for a living is the reason you are like this, it's the fighting, the pain, the stress... it can't be helped; you need to force yourself to eat despite what your body is telling you. I will have the team keep an eye on you during meals."

"I don't need babysitting."

"I know however, as much as I am against it, in some aspect we need to work as a team, pushing and encouraging the other when the time calls for it," Medic added with a sigh. His own morals working against him, oh how he hated when that happened.

"The sound of the chopper chills me to my feet, doc. I never use to be scared of that thing. It's just a friggin helicopter for crying out loud!" Scout blurted out. It's amazing how this was all coming out now, sure he tried to talk to others, teammates, letters to home, but he could only go so far until it started getting awkward. Talking to the Medic right now, the words were just gliding of his tongue with ease, his mind not even thinking.

Medic rested his chin on his hand. "Hmm, interesting indeed. It must be fuelling your grief. Could it be the aspect of it both brings us new recruits to fight this...useless war...as well as brings us our food, our supplies while at the same time takes out brings the fallen ones back home to be dealt with as the family sees fit?" he asked with raised brows.

Scout thought this over for a few moments. When he thought about it, having it pointed out like that made sense. "Yeh. Yeh I think you're right doc"

"It is my job after all Herr Scout" Medic added with a sly smile. "Not finished yet?"

The runner chuckled; he was starting to feel better already, by an inch. "You got that right. Hey, man, what's this rash? It friggin comes and goes like the dreams I've been having. I don't suppose you can tell me what that means as well, huh?"

"You are only 19, Scout. Still very young, you shouldn't have to see this side of life. Alright let me see..." Medic sighed and pulled out a set of gloves from the desk draw, it was going to be a long night…


End file.
